|My awesome family, some day my nephew will be old enough to play miniature games with me, mwahaha!|
1. Have high expectations for yourself, and work hard to make yourself better. This is a given. Self-impovement is the game here, alway reflecting and striving to improve your personality, finances, skills, spirituality, everything. However, the problem with having high expectations for yourself, is that you generally also have high expectations for people around you. This will always be disappointing because no one is going to be the specific way you think they should be. Which leads to the next point...
2. Have low expectations of other people. Not in the sense that they are stupid, but in the sense they may not have they won't be the same as you. For example, i don't expect my room-mate to do any cleaning because if i ask him and he doesn't do as clean as job as i would, i would get mad at him. I just do the cleaning to my high level of standard and if he helps out without me asking it's a bonus. Which leads me to my next point:
3. There are many right answers. Usually we do things in a certain way or method because we believe it is the best way. We think our way is right. But what realized is other people may do things in a different way because they think it is right. Who is right? The solution to getting along with other people is to realize that there may be multiple right answers, and this is okay. We all have our own narrow mindset but the reality is for most things it doesn't really matter and doing things differently from what you think is the right way is okay. For example, at a recent party i was planning my friend wanted to cook western foods and got mad when i wanted to bring some eastern foods. But in the grand scheme of things more food (no matter what the type) is merrier for parties, so it didn't matter. there can be more than one right answer when you look at things with a wider perspective.
4. Don't be offended. Most of the time, when someone does something that offends us they didn't really mean to offend you. If they didn't mean to, then why do you get angry? You're only hurting yourself. Offense should only be taken when there is true intent against you. A lot of times we just don't know why they acted in a certain way, and if we knew their situation, then we wouldn't be offended. Example: Sally was really offended and hurt when her friends decided to leave their church without telling anybody. How can they be good friends if they don't tell her they were planning to leave? But the reality was that they left quietly because they still respected the pastor (even tho they didn't agree with him) and didn't want to cause discord in the church. So there was no intent to offend Sally, they had another reason. Yet Sally got hurt and angrily put up a wall, she basically hurt her own relationship with other people when they had meant well. True story within my family (although Sally is a made up name). Don't be easily offended. So when can we get angry?
5. Don't get angry, unless against true injustice. So don't get angry when people don't intend to harm you. But Jesus takes it one step further, don't be angry when people DO intend to harm you. This is tough, so when can you be angry? I believe anger and action is warranted against true injustice, like child prostitution. You don't need to defend yourself against insults because you know what? You're tough, you can take it. Defend those who can't defend themselves, people who get taken advantage of.
I guess the point of it all is to change your perspective. Our natural perspective is change others to solve our problems, when we should be looking how we can change ourselves. Our natural perspective to think we're always right when there may be multiple right answers. Our natural perspective to focus on us and how people hurt us, when we should be focusing on how we can care for others. I hope and believe that with this change of perspective our lives could better, meaningful, and happier in the year 2011. Peace.